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Wake up first!

Archimandrite Andrew Konanos has a powerful account of his encounter with St Porphyrios (+1991):

I asked the elder: “Father, tell me what should I do with my family?” Geronda answered me with his eyes closed: “You fight with your father, do not tell him anything more about confession. Awake first, feel the presence of Christ in your heart. Show patience and obedience, pray and keep silence. And in two, three, five, or six years you will see a miracle. As for now, listen to your parents and pray for them. Repeat what I’ve told you”…
Saint elder knew that some things in our life happen not when we want it, but when the appropriate time comes for each of us. Therefore, it is very important for us to awaken spiritually. The Lord will not ask us why have not our parents, friends, or children – all those around us – changed, but He will certainly ask why have not you changed. If you are transforming from within, doing inner work on yourself, it will bear fruits…
Nothing changes magically in our life. Some may even see Christ, but this does not mean that they will change anything in their lives. Others say: “I want to see a living saint”. If you really need it, the Lord will send the right person to you so that you can benefit from the conversation with him. It is enough for you to be ready to work on yourself – and a spiritual mentor will appear who will give the appropriate advice for you.

This speaks (to me) not only of family relations but of any kind of outreach. “Acquire the Spirit of Peace, and thousands